Books
Books
Books from the field that are on my list — each with a short note on what it's about. Not reviews, more of a reading list. Where available, the ISBN is listed so you can find each book at any bookshop.
The Ethical Slut
A Practical Guide to Polyamory, Open Relationships, and Other Freedoms in Sex and Love
Janet W. Hardy & Dossie Easton
One of the most widely cited books of the modern polyamory movement, here in the revised third edition. A practical guide to jealousy, communication and consensual non-monogamy. Also available in German as "Schlampen mit Moral".
EnglishTen Speed PressISBN 978-0-399-57966-0
Polysecure
Bindung, Trauma und konsensuelle Nicht-Monogamie
Jessica Fern
Jessica Fern extends attachment theory to consensual non-monogamy: how attachment patterns, trauma, jealousy and insecurity play together in relationships with more than one person — and what secure attachment can mean there. Listed here in the German edition; the English original is "Polysecure: Attachment, Trauma and Consensual Nonmonogamy".
Germandivana VerlagISBN 978-3-910590-02-1
More Than Two
A Practical Guide to Ethical Polyamory
Franklin Veaux & Eve Rickert
A comprehensive guide to different polyamory structures, ethics and common pitfalls — including a look at hierarchies and "rules about other people".
EnglishThorntree Press
Opening Up
A Guide to Creating and Sustaining Open Relationships
Tristan Taormino
An interview-based overview of many different open relationship models — from swinging to polyamory — without promoting any single structure as "the right one".
EnglishCleis Press
111 Gründe, offen zu lieben
Ein Loblied auf offene Beziehungen, Polyamorie und die Freundschaft
Cornelia Jönsson & Simone Maresch
"111 reasons to love openly": a celebration of open relationships, polyamory and friendship in 111 short chapters. It's told through a fictional relationship network — Florian, Annika, Margit, Johannes, Cem and others — "entirely made up and based on real events". An easy read, more everyday stories than theory.
GermanSchwarzkopf & SchwarzkopfISBN 978-3-86265-712-4
Die Psychologie sexueller Leidenschaft
David Schnarch
Couples and sex therapist David Schnarch on desire and intimacy in long-term relationships. The central idea is differentiation: staying yourself in close connection rather than defining yourself through your partner's validation. Written with couples in mind, but interesting to me because it's about autonomy within closeness. German edition of "Passionate Marriage".
GermanKlett-CottaISBN 978-3-608-96109-6
Gewaltfreie Kommunikation
Eine Sprache des Lebens
Marshall B. Rosenberg
The foundational book on Nonviolent Communication (NVC). Rosenberg describes four steps — observation, feeling, need, request — and an attitude grounded in empathy rather than judgement. A helpful language for me when it comes to expressing wishes and boundaries, especially in relationships without a given script. German edition of "Nonviolent Communication: A Language of Life".
GermanJunfermann VerlagISBN 978-3-95571-572-4
The Smart Girl's Guide to Polyamory
Everything You Need to Know About Open Relationships, Non-Monogamy, and Alternative Love
Dedeker Winston
An introduction to polyamory from the co-host of the Multiamory podcast, with lots of practical examples.
EnglishSkyhorse
Love's Not Color Blind
Race and Representation in Polyamorous and Other Alternative Communities
Kevin A. Patterson
Deals with race, diversity and exclusion within non-monogamous communities.
EnglishThorntree Press
- Growing
The list grows with what I read.